Here's today's big thought:

Life is going to have challenges, problems and disappointments no matter what. So wouldn't you rather have the challenges, problems and disappointments that come with building the dream life you actually want to live, rather than the ones that come with settling for a tolerable life that you're just trying to get through every day?

Avoiding the challenges of your dream life doesn't spare you problems and pain; avoiding the challenges of your dream life just means you end up with life's problems and pain and a sub-optimal life.

Better to have problems and pain and your dream life (or something much closer to it than what you have by settling and avoiding).

So go for it! Start building your dream life! What do you have to lose? Life can only get better if you lean in to your dreams and make your life more of what you've always wanted it to be.

Hello, friends!

I wanted to share with you some exciting news...I am hard at work on a new novel, "Ghost Plane." I'm in the outlining stage now, and aiming for publication by the end of the year. Here's a brief synopsis: 

Sound interesting? I'd love to hear from you. Post a comment below!

​Cheers!

I love to read, and I'm a genius at seizing moments throughout the day to grab a few sentences here or a couple paragraphs there, whether I'm standing in line or walking to my car. My phone and the Amazon Kindle app are a godsend, because an entire library is always in my pocket and just a swipe away.

By my count, I read 26 books this past year. (Not bad!)

I read 10 novels -- consisting of some military fiction and several entertaining movie tie-ins -- but none of them made my "favorite list" for the year.

The other 16 books I read were non-fiction, spanning topics in personal development, spirituality, business, military history, and creative writing. Four of them really stood out that I thought I'd share, in case you're looking for your next good read.

Here are the four gems from my library this year:

• ​How to Be an Imperfectionist by Stephen Guise
• The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level by Gay Hendricks
• The Way of the SEAL by Mark Divine
• Nine Day Novel: How to Use Story Structure to Write Your Novel Faster by Stephen Windsor

I recommend you read these books, and here's why...

​How to Be an Imperfectionist by Stephen Guise
Those of us who care a lot, and have high standards, can easily fall into the trap of perfectionism. Perfectionism often leads to delay, distraction, and inaction on the things we really care about. We're afraid to take action, pursue our dreams, and put ourselves out there, either because we're afraid it might not be perfect, or we know it won't be perfect and so we never start. Perfectionism can also make life really stressful, because we perfectionists often work so hard to keep everything together, and to make sure everything always goes "just right."

I've struggled with this unfortunate condition myself, and I have read a few books about it over the years. This is by far the best book on the subject that I've come across. There is so much deep insight here about perfectionism, how it works in different forms, and the (well-intentioned) psychology that drives it. Even more valuable, Guise provides excellent, simple techniques for moving past it in its various forms.

For example, one technique that I've used a lot is to decide to be content with smaller steps and any kind of progress, rather than expecting perfect steps and ideal conditions. Here's how this works: If you are afraid to give a presentation because you worry that it might not be stellar, for instance, simply lower the bar. Decide that standing up and doing it at all is a win, particularly if giving presentations is a challenge for you. Sounds simple, but it is very powerful.

There are many other excellent techniques that are easy to implement, but rather than explaining them, it's best for you to just buy the book and read it. If you're a perfectionist, you will finish this book with a commitment to living the freer, more satisfying life of an imperfectionist.

The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level by Gay Hendricks
All I can say is, "Wow!" Hendricks has pulled back the curtain to reveal one of the most powerful and invisible psychological forces that limits our potential as human beings, and creates unnecessary conflict, drama, difficulties, and even illnesses and accidents in our lives. He calls it the Upper Limit Problem.

His thesis is that we all have an inner thermostat that defines how good inside we're comfortable feeling, and how good we're comfortable with our life becoming. And that whenever a success or a blessing comes our way that takes us too high above that subconscious comfort level, we will take action to bring it back down to where we are comfortable (which is not where our full potential lies, of course). We may start an argument, we may have sudden financial problems, we might start worrying and obsessing about something, or we might even get sick or hurt. One clue to this pattern is to notice whether these things occur soon after something good happens.

Most of us, Hendricks argues, stay in our Zone of Competence, where we're comfortable. We dream of reaching our "Zone of Genius", but whenever we try, something always seems to bring us back down. That, he points out, is the Upper Limit Problem at work. Hendricks highlights the common ways that the Upper Limit Problem shows up in our lives, and recommends specific actions to short-circuit it, by ultimately expanding our tolerance for goodness in our lives, and using the troublesome symptoms as guideposts on the way to our Zone of Genius. 

He starts the book with three questions to challenge the reader, which I'll share with you here:

• Are you willing to increase the amount of time every day that you feel good inside?
• Are you willing to increase the amount of time that your whole life is going well?
• Are you willing to feel good inside, and have your life go well, all the time?

This book is a real eye-opener to how our subconscious patterns work, why we struggle to fulfill the potential we know is there, and how to break through to that next level of happiness, fulfillment, and contribution. I recommend you buy it and read it to take your life to that next level. I found it to be profound.

The Way of the SEAL by Mark Divine
Hooyah! Commander Mark Divine, a former Navy SEAL, is founder of SEALFit, a company that trains special operations aspirants and others to reach their peak physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual fitness. Elite military operators are known for their professionalism, commitment, focus, organizational skills, tolerance for discomfort, and physical and emotional control. That's because these are the folks who sneak straight into the teeth of the enemy, get the job done, and get back out without any casualties (usually), and often without even being seen. Imagine if you could apply a Navy SEAL's level of clarity, commitment, and focus to your life and to your life's purpose. Divine's book, The Way of the SEAL, provides that very framework.

Through 9 specific principles, Divine shows you how to get clear about your life mission and purpose, how to plan that mission thoroughly and systematically, and then how to execute that plan with commitment and efficiency, in the style that a Navy SEAL would approach a combat mission.

I loved the book enough to buy the video course that goes with it, and although the video course was outrageously expensive, I love reinforcing the principles in new ways that help me integrate these practices into my life. I've used Divine's techniques to bring greater clarity, focus, and commitment to my life this past year, and I like his cheerful, motivating tone.

Not everybody grooves to the style of a military viewpoint on management or personal development, but I love the sense of order, clarity and commitment Divine brings to the subject. If you want to learn how to "earn your Trident every day," as Divine says, get the book and put his techniques into practice. I can vouch for it...this is good stuff!

Nine Day Novel: How to Use Story Structure to Write Your Novel Faster by Stephen Windsor
This is a delightful, short book with a specific plan on how to write a novel in 9 days. Now that's pretty extreme, and it is a serious 9-day marathon, but I've written most of my first-draft novels in 30 days, so I can personally attest that it certainly can be done. The 9 days isn't even that important...you can spread it out over whatever period makes sense. The real value of the book is in the powerful simplicity of story structure that Windsor lays out for you to follow.

A novel is made up of so many elements, including plot, character, setting, dialogue, conflict, and theme (among others). I think of the plot, or story structure, as the scaffolding that the whole work hangs on. When the scaffolding is in place, then you can paint in and layer the character, the settings, the dialogue and conflict to create a rich blend of experience, and (hopefully) a good story. By following the classic, driving narrative structure that Windsor provides, you have the foundation you need to carry all the other elements of the story.

Whatever the subject may be, I'm a big fan of understanding the discipline's fundamentals, and of applying the 80/20 principle: What 20% of the information about this subject area will give me 80% of the results I'm after? This is the key 20%. This short book will give you a powerful story structure to follow that ensures the story's momentum, and frees you to focus on the other elements that make a good tale.

If you've wanted to write a novel and get it done quick, or if you've wanted a fast education on story structure that will serve you well for years to come, buy Windsor's book and put the practices to work!

So that's my roundup -- my favorite books for 2015.

What was your favorite read this year?

Post it in the comments below, so we can find some more gems for 2016!

Happy Fourth of July!

I, for one, am profoundly glad that I live in the United States of America. I am so grateful for my freedom and safety from tyranny and oppression.

Not that everyone in this country feels that way -- there remains a societal and sometimes government-backed oppression of various peoples in our country (minorities, women, and the LGBT community, for example). But we continue to evolve and improve, and all of us enjoy a fundamental level of freedom and security that is unheard of in many countries and regions of the world. 

Yesterday I read an article that the amount of people who call themselves "extremely proud" to be an American has dropped three percentage points, from 57% to 54%, and this figure continues a decline from previous years.

For myself, I notice that over the years, my pride in being an American keeps going up. As I notice and appreciate the freedom I've had to make of my life what I will, and to support my wife and son in doing the same, my love and gratitude for my country, and for those who have sacrificed to make it what it is today -- from the Founding Fathers, to the Service members, to the oppressed who have stood up for justice and equality -- my love and gratitude continues to deepen and grow. 

I hope that you have a wonderful (and safe!) holiday, and as your eyes happen to catch the American flag today, or as you see happy children playing -- free of fear, and full of potential in the land of opportunity -- may you feel a sense of appreciation and fondness for this great country that we have the privilege of being a part of and contributing to.

Ours may not be a perfect country, but it is a great country, and I wouldn't want to call anywhere else home.

Happy Independence Day!

--Judd

P.S. We have the freedom to create the life each of us wants to live, but it requires that we make decisions and take action. If you know someone facing an important decision, why not share my book with them, DECIDE! 6 Steps to Great Decisions. If you've read the book, you know how helpful the DECIDE process is, in clearing away confusion, and bringing clarity and confidence to all of our decisions and life plans.

Just send them this link: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00WCRXEM0/.  

Or if you're feeling especially generous, you can gift them a copy -- right now it's only $2.99. Click on that link, then click the "Give as a Gift" button. What better way to celebrate freedom and opportunity than to share a 6-step process that can help our loved ones live life on their terms, and unleash their talents for the benefit of all.

One of the greatest challenges with making an important decision is all the random thoughts, feelings, anxieties, and questions we have rattling around in our brain about it. All this internal clutter can feel confusing and overwhelming, which leads to procrastination, until we corral it all into some kind of order.

The process outlined in my book, "DECIDE! - 6 Steps to Great Decisions,"  is designed to solve this problem, but mind mapping all by itself can greatly simplify and accelerate your decision making, and is a great supplement to the 6 Steps.

Mind mapping is intuitive, because it reflects the actual functioning of the brain, rather than a linear list of disconnected items.

What is a Mind Map?
First of all, let's define a Mind Map, in case you haven't encountered this concept before. 

The human brain functions through a vast network of associations between related thoughts and feelings, which include the senses, memories and emotions. 

For example, if I prompt you to concentrate on the thought of an elephant and to tell me what an elephant means to you, you will probably first mentally see the shape and various parts of the elephant; you will notice its color, and the texture of its skin. If you've been around one or seen one, you may recall the sounds your heard or the smells you associated with that experience. 
 
You might recall a memory of seeing one on a trip to zoo, and the image and feelings that memory evokes, including who you were with, what the weather was like, how old you were, and perhaps even the ice cream cone or toy you got while there. 

You may recall images of Ganesha, the Hindu god with the elephant head, or the red/white/blue logo of the U.S. Republican Party. You may think of a picture book with elephants that a family member read to you when you were growing up, and the sights, sounds, smells of those early experiences. 

And since I asked you to describe what this elephant "means" to you, you will also take a moment to consider what meaning means to you...how you represent it, and express it to another person, and then relate that to the context of an elephant.

As you can see, the brain can travel a lot of ground very quickly because of all these associations.

A mind map -- which you can think of as a powerful form of note-taking or brainstorming -- is simply a way of visually representing these various elements and their interconnections. You start with a core thought or element in the center of the page -- in this case, "Elephant" -- and draw out all the connections that relate. Our example might look like this:

NOTE: Here is a PDF version if you the image above is too small for viewing:

You can draw up a mind map anytime, just on a piece of paper with a pen. Simply write your core starting point in the center of the page, and start writing branches off of that as they relate to your core thought and the intended purpose of your mind map.

Or you can make a mind map online with mind mapping software (I happen to use MindNode, but be advised that it is for Mac/iOS only). If you want to have a mind mapping tool for your computer, research what products are available for your platform, and take advantage of the free trial software before committing; some are expensive, and some work better than others.

Mind mapping can be used to take notes in a business meeting or a school class, to brainstorm ideas or solutions, or -- to the point of this blog entry -- to think through a decision. Let's see how that's done.

Using a Mind Map On A Decision
The DECIDE! Process has 6 steps:

D - Declare What You Want
E - Establish Your Decision Frame
C - Come Up With Alternatives
I - Investigate and Research
D - Do It!
E - Evaluate the Feedback

You can create a mind map to write down all the outcomes of this decision that are important for you and those you care about. These desired outcomes can occur across multiple dimensions: personal, professional, emotional, spiritual, etc. Then you can prioritize them by listing them in order, or grouping them on the mind map.

You can make a mind map to brainstorm all the possible alternatives or choices you come up with for getting you what you want. And you can relate the costs and benefits to each one, so that you can weigh and compare them.

You can make a mind map to brainstorm -- and then keep track of -- any information you need to get in order to make the decision today, so that you know what to research, stay on track, document your findings, and avoid analysis paralysis.

Or you can create one giant mind map that contains all of these elements.

For your convenience, I created a complete mind map template for you to use with the DECIDE! Process. 

The mind map template looks like this:

If you have mind mapping software, download this OPML file, and import it into your mind mapping software:

I've also included a PDF version of the mind map for those of you using paper, or if you just want a quick reference:

I like using the mind map because it lets me dump out onto paper everything I'm thinking, feeling or wondering about, so my head remains clear for thinking and evaluating. It also gives me a holistic visual representation of all those considerations, so that I can see all the connections, and make new ones. Creating and reading a mind map always generates new thoughts and insights for me, and I bet it will for you too.

Give it a try, and share how it worked for you in the comments below!

Cheers!